Drugs, lost custody: one woman's descent into hell
May 16, 2009
For the woman involved in the Coffs Harbour group sex allegation, life has become unbearable, writes Jessica Halloran.
Before that night, she lived a simple life with her mum, dad and her baby son in a sleepy street in Coffs Harbour. But since that evening, which led to her accusing up to six Bulldogs players of gang raping her, her life has been in ruins.
Now 25, Jane (not her real name) has battled drug addiction and homelessness. She no longer has full custody of her young son. On the day he started school last year, his mum was not there to wave him off as he walked through the school gates. She had no fixed address and was battling drug addiction.
The little boy, who has his mother's eyes, had sensed something was wrong. "My mum is not very good today," he said after one of her visits.
Every few weeks she sees her son, but she is not allowed to have him by herself. In the past, she has stolen from his money box to help fund her addiction. She has stolen thousands of dollars from her sister. She has stolen from her parents. Her mother and father are deeply saddened by their daughter's decline.
They found brief hope after they sent her to a rehabilitation facility in Sydney in 2007 and she showed signs of recovery. But her return to Coffs Harbour saw her fall into a spiral of drug use again. In recent years she's been seen wandering the Coffs streets with her head shaved. Fingers have been pointed, words have been muttered.
Before the Bulldogs came to town, her life was relatively normal. She was a single mum. The father of her son helped look after the boy, but she was considered fragile. Those close to her said that February 22 was the catalyst for her decline.
"Her life is worse than the other two that spoke [on Four Corners]," a source close to her says. "She's a victim of major proportions."
The woman has chosen not to speak about that fateful night, after which no police charges were laid. She has turned down $100,000 from a tabloid television program and lucrative magazine deals. When the Herald approached her earlier this year, five years to the day after the Bulldogs sex scandal, she crumpled in a sobbing heap. Her distress and trauma were palpable.
The Herald last year interviewed her child's grandmother, Alice (not her real name), the mother of her former partner. She spoke of the immense worry the woman's state has had on the whole family.
"Worry - it's just something you do about her," Alice said. "She's one of those such likeable people and [her mother] she put her down in some rehab place in Sydney, that went really good. [Her mother] was getting her really good help. [Her mother] was doing heaps for her and then they let her out and it was too soon."
Following that rehab stint in 2007, Jane ended up on the streets but her mother would find someone to watch over her and give money to the local soup kitchen. When the Herald met Jane earlier this year, she had recently returned home to live with her parents after being by herself in a unit block in Coffs Harbour. A life that had become desperate suddenly had at least some stability.
"When she is on the streets, [her mother] gets somebody to watch out for her," Alice said last year. "But there's nothing anybody can do for her now until [Jane] gets the help that she wants. [Jane] is not to pick [her son] up from school. She's not to go near the school. You don't know what might happen, she used to steal money out of his money box. I think it's just the way she is, she's just not well. Her parents, they still care. [Her mother] is giving money to the soup kitchen to watch out for her, she definitely still watches out for her. If she ever wants to get help again, [her mother] will be 100 per cent there to help her do it."
When the Herald talked to Alice last year she also spoke about her concern for Jane's child. He was six last November and is in his second year of primary school. Alice believes he is now "used" to not having his mother present all the time.
"I don't think he knows any better now, it's just the way it is, I don't think registers because she's never been there," Alice says. "But his dad has."
Alice believes that Jane had problems before the Bulldogs incident but says that night tipped the then 20-year-old over the edge.
"I think the big story that was made of it may have pushed her too far," Alice says. "It was the stories afterwards, it kept going and going. But that doesn't mean they did not do something wrong. I think it was pretty sad on both sides. I think about their mothers, too …
"[Her son] very rarely sees her now. It might be once every two or three weeks. It might be once a month. It all depends if she is here, or if she rings up. [The child's father] sometimes thinks it might be doing more damage than good. He doesn't know why she's not there. They know that she is not to ever have him on her own."
Jane and the child's father were together for 12 months before she fell pregnant. After the incident with the Bulldogs, the child's father still cared greatly for his ex-partner and the trauma she went through.
"He still cared about her, so it was pretty bad," Alice says. "He never discussed it with anybody, he never talked about it with anybody, any of the reporters approached him he wouldn't talk about it. He'd never talk about [Jane], he still won't talk about [Jane]. He never put her down. If he hears things like what she's up to, he might tell me, and feels really bad for her. He's just not a cruel person."
Jane's pain and her family's pain is a stark contrast to what a former Bulldogs footballer, who took her back to the Pacific Bay Hotel that humid night in 2004, had to say about the incident in a recent interview with the Herald. He spoke of her with disdain and blamed her for the scrutiny placed on today's footballers.
"It's a shame to think one person has done," he told the Herald. "I think it's changed a lot of other things now. Even in general life as well as sport, everyone is getting too uptight. They're trying to take the fun out of everything."
He wished that Jane had been charged with being a public nuisance.
"I hate it [the allegations]," he said. "I don't understand how someone can do that. Be nice if she could have got a bit of justice her way. We were told pretty much that we could have had her charged with being a public nuisance. They said you're as close as that to having her charged, to pretty much have it proved."
Today Jane is living with her parents on that sleepy street in Coffs Harbour.
The Herald understands her son spends the majority of his time living with his father.
Alice hopes that one day everyone's lives will find some calm.
"You hope everyone gets their lives back," Alice says. "I get my life back to do the things I'm doing.
"[My son] and bubby get theirs, [Jane's parents] and me will always be there for [the child]. It's going to be really all right."
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